Updated insider information by Chellie Campbell, author of “The Wealthy Spirit: Daily Affirmations for Financial Stress Reduction”
“People travel to wonder at the height of mountains, at the huge waves of the sea, at the long courses of rivers, at the vast compass of the ocean, at the circular motion of the stars, and they pass themselves by without wondering.”—St. Augustine
When you were growing up, were you ever told not to brag? Perhaps you were put down for talking positively about yourself. You might have been taught to cover your pride with a patina of false modesty because that was considered appropriate behavior. Unfortunately, that habit of “being nice” makes it really difficult to ask for a raise, ask for a promotion, or a larger fee from a client.
We don’t take inventory of the evidence we have to feel good about ourselves. What we do is tell ourselves, “Oh, I should have done that better.” A perfect example of that is when a friend of mine was making her first speech in front of an audience. Susan was very nervous, but I encouraged her to speak from her heart and her knowledge to help the listeners and she would be fine. She did a great job, and I congratulated her afterward, telling her she did great.
Immediately, Susan started telling me how she didn’t do great. “Oh, I forgot to say this, and I stumbled over that, and I screwed up this other…” I said, “Stop right there. Everybody who speaks has the same story. What you need to know is something I learned as an actor: Most of the audience can’t tell when you’ve made a mistake. They don’t know that you forgot to say something, because they don’t have access to the script. They don’t know that you messed up this or that, they just get a feeling from you, and the feeling that you gave them tonight was great.” Susan blushed in pleasure as she thought about this. I said, “So you don’t get to criticize yourself any about that. Just don’t let your mind go there. Go to the place where you were wonderful and fabulous and think about that. Tonight is your night to bask in the glory. You can work on improvement another day.” Susan grinned and said she liked that idea a lot.
I love to give (and get!) positive messages like that. They are little valentines of pleasure to be smiled over and cherished. You, too, can be a harbinger of good tidings to the people around you. Take the time to give compliments. It takes very little—and it’s fun! And people are so appreciative. No one gets enough compliments. They hear “constructive criticism” internally and externally: What they did wrong, what’s missing, what they need to improve—not what’s great.
Change that. Be happy, fabulous and successful—because you are!
Today’s Affirmation: “I am happy, fabulous, and successful!”